Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Lonliness Gave Me Cancer

I think that I've been self-medicating with cigarettes and alcohol (neither of which I've ever considered myself a habitual, or even frequent, user of) over the past month or so. I've been trying to figure out what, exactly, it is that I'm trying to medicate here. I guess I'm just not really suited to spending as much time alone as I have been lately.

For three years I spent time nearly every day with someone whom I cared very deeply about. It's been almost three months now since we broke up, and I think I'm starting to get my fill of quality time with myself. I have a ton of friends, and as huge as LSU is I still know people in all of my classes this semester. I talk to the Captain of Industry every night. I love my job and the people I work with. But I still just spend such a large part of each day in my apartment alone with the rabbit. My roommate started a hardcore Internal Auditing program this semester, so even when she's home (which is rare, since this program is a huge time commitment) she's in her room studying or is so completely exhausted that enlisting her to entertain me is more than a little selfish. As much as I adore Harold the Bunny, he's not exactly great for stimulating conversation. (Although I did read of a woman once who could communicate telepathically with her rabbit, perhaps I should look into that).

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