Christmas cash and cookies

Last week, my friend Cassie's mom handed her ten crisp five dollar bills, and solemnly pronounced that for the past decade or so, she's been roaming around Dollar Trees and K-Marts, handing out cash to children who look underprivileged. She decided this year to split the money up between Cassie and her brother, instructing them to go distribute the Christmas joy on their own. "If you spend any of the money, God will strike you dead right then, and you'll go to hell, and I'll be very disappointed with you.

I've been to Wal-Mart only once in the last six months, to ask the detail cop if he knew where the homeless kids hang out in the area (those little suckers are hard to find). But today I went to Wal-Mart and took twenty bucks of my own out of the ATM, and went around with Cassie handing ones and fives to little kids in ratty clothes. It was so much fun, and I thought the parents would be suspicious or insulted, but half of them were just so surprised, and the other half just smiled and said thank you. One mom was looking away when I gave a five dollar bill to each of her sons. She looked up just as I was walking away, and I heard them telling her, "Mom, this lady just said 'Merry Christmas!' and gave us money!" And I smiled.

Then I came home and made Christmas cookies, which didn't go nearly as well. I first tried to make them yesterday, but I didn't have any baking soda, so I searched the internet for a recipe that didn't require any, and found one, but it turns out baking soda is a pretty vital element. So I went to the store this morning and got some, but by the time I started rolling the dough I'd run out of flour and my dough kept sticking to everything and refused to maintain any sort of Christmas-y shapes, so back to the store I went. So I finally got home tonight and was ready to go, pulled my dough out of the fridge, cut it into bells and stars and santas and trees, popped it in the oven, and approximately 12 and a half minutes later took my first bite, and it was disgusting. Too much baking soda. Bleh. I'm now covered in flour and completely disillusioned with baking, so I'm giving up on cookies for the night and going drinking instead.

posted by Just Call Me Fabulous @ 10:17 PM